


A Deep Breath and Steady Hands

by dancer4813



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Role Reversal, Canon-Typical Violence, Julius escapes instead of Percy, Starts Pre-Stream, Tal'dorei Campaign
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-10 06:43:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10431462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dancer4813/pseuds/dancer4813
Summary: When his family is killed by visitors to Whitestone and Julius is the only one to escape their clutches, he loses his faith and seeks justice on his own power. But fate seems to have a different idea when he ends up in the path of a certain group of mercenaries and he finds something he's been missing for the last four years.





	1. Set a Fire in Our Flesh

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a Julius-escapes-instead-of-Percy AU, inspired by [tanoraqui](https://tanoraqui.tumblr.com/post/158247495517/lately-ive-been-thinking-a-lot-about-an-au-where) (NevillesGran on AO3) and [arkhamarchitecture](http://arkhamarchitecture.tumblr.com/post/158249237727/lately-ive-been-thinking-a-lot-about-an-au-where) on tumblr, who both kick-started my muse for this. Some things will be different from their stories, and some things will be similar, but I highly recommend you check out their individual works. 
> 
> This will be my first multi-chapter fic for Critical Role, and the goal is to post on Friday or Saturday evenings (variable, because I'm a college student with way too much on my plate). But thank you for checking it out, and I hope you enjoy my delving into this alternate universe!

There was a part of Julius that remembered his time in service to Pelor and wondered what he would be doing had he continued with that path in life. He’d left Whitestone before swearing any oath to the god of the sun and agriculture, but there was an indecisive part of him that stirred at the worst moments, questioning his actions.

Julius was quite sure that, had he become a champion of Pelor, he wouldn’t be loitering in a tavern, waiting for proof of his foe’s presence there so he could take the opportunity to murder the man.

No, Pelor’s teachings focused on charity and goodwill, performing acts of blessing in the face of darkness and spreading light to all corners of Exandria.

Julius had found that, sometimes, the world was too dark for good deeds to bring it light, and that, sometimes, a colder justice was required.

It had taken years for Julius to reach the point where he had courage enough to face his demons – years of training with blade and magic. And even with all that confidence he’d gained he still doubted himself at the most critical moments.

 _De Rolos must be confident in their strides,_ his father’s voice echoed in his ears. _Rulers must know their people and themselves, and stand firmly behind their actions. To falter is to lose their trust._

Luckily, Julius had been on his own for years. He owed allegiance to no one, and he was ready to pay the debts laid on him all those years ago. His opportunity had even come earlier than he anticipated, and he was as prepared as he could hope to be.

Swirling the mug of ale in his hand, Julius pretended to take a sip, eyes fixed near the door. He glanced over at the musician who was playing – a lithe elven woman with a flute to her lips, fingers dancing over the notes – and turned his attention back to the task at hand. Since Ethel had been killed he hadn’t found much attraction toward anyone, despite being the ladies’ man of the family when he was younger.

Julius vaguely remembered his first ball, when his parents had been proud to show off their eldest son. He had danced with so many different girls that evening that his parents had praised him about it the next morning at breakfast.

The teasing from Vesper had lasted for months.

With a rush of wind, the door to the tavern opened and Julius was abruptly brought back to the task at hand. He couldn’t allow himself to falter, not now. Not when he was so close.

The two figures who had entered the tavern were short and stocky, seeming to have some dwarf blood in them, by their looks and dress. Not his quarry, and the pair made their way directly toward the bar, handing over a few coins for drinks that they took to a table on Julius’ right.

Another chill rush of wind swept through the tavern, and Julius looked up, only to feel his heart freeze in his chest for a moment. That profile – the square jaw, the round face that hid the short temper and, frankly, irritating personality – was too familiar for him to forget, even after two years. He’d seen the man lead patrols and report to his parents on many occasions.

He’d also seen the man cut his mother’s throat with impudence, having the gall to chuckle as she bled out before her eldest son, blood spilling crimson over the stonework.

Clenching his cup with one hand, Julius took a deep drink of the ale he had hardly touched for hours, and relished the gentle burn down his throat. It wasn’t enough to cloud his mind and tip the scales against him, but the anxiety he had felt was beginning to fade, and a pit of rage simmered to life in his gut instead.

Julius watched as Stonefell made his way through the tavern without haste, casually moving between tables to the staircase at the back of the main room, which led up to the guest rooms. The man had a presence about him, as he always had, that portrayed him as the most important person in the room. However, instead of the admiration Julius had held for the posturing in his youth, a sick feeling was curling in his chest, desperate to be wrung out or released.

Julius made himself count to ten, taking a couple deep breaths, before he downed the rest of the liquid in his cup and stood to follow Stonefell to his room.

Taking a deep breath as he trailed after the man, measuring his steps and guarding his expression, Julius tried to tamp down the rush of blood through his ears.

His fingers twitched, wanting to take hold of the sword at his waist. He kept himself from wincing at the creak of floorboards beneath his feet. His eyes and ears were on guard for someone who would stop him.

Julius passed patrons going about their evenings, and he steadied himself as he passed the last table. He reminded himself that as far as anybody else knew, he had nothing to hide. He was only a stranger passing through

A right turn at the top of the stairs, five closed doors between him and the last room on the left.

He picked up his pace, the fire inside pushing him on even as he hesitated.

Julius glanced around, making sure that nobody was watching. The hallway was empty, so he put his ear against the door and heard the faint sounds of footsteps across the length of the room, a rustle of cloth, a thud as something hit the ground.

He took another breath and opened the door.

\--

Stonefell looked up, eyes wide, as Julius rushed toward him. Julius raised his sword, ready to bring down an arcing blow, but the man’s reflexes were quick and he just managed to parry the swing with a dagger.

Not expecting a counter, Julius nearly lost his blade, but he recovered and swung again, going for the stomach. A narrow gash cut through the leather, a hint of crimson peeking out the rip as Stonefell grunted with pain.

“I noticed someone watching me,” Stonefell said, dropping his dagger and pulling out his short sword. “But I never thought it would be you, Julius.”

Julius felt a sharp pain down his leg as Stonefell’s sword cut deep. Stumbling backward, he bit back a shout, a growing fire kindling in his chest, and he felt more than heard a hiss of rage in the back of his head.

Pressing forward, Julius managed to block the next swing of the sword toward his side. There was a clang of metal on metal as the two blades connected, and he hoped that the sound wouldn’t carry enough to draw unwanted visitors.

The hiss in the back of his head grew, forming words even as Julius muttered a familiar incantation.

 _Vengeance_ , the voice whispered. _Vengeance._

 _Justice_ , Julius reminded himself. _Justice for Mother and Ethel-_

Julius held out his hand and delivered a burst of flame toward the man before him, burning off the right shoulder of his armor. Stonefell reeled backward as he yelled with pain, and Julius used the opening to land two armor-piercing blows, straight across the man’s chest.

“You killed my mother and my beloved!” Julius exclaimed, clutching his sword tighter. “You’ll pay for what you’ve done!”

A hum of approval echoed in Julius’ mind, and he saw a wisp of black smoke out of the corner of his eye. Looking around momentarily for the source of the fire, Julius was distracted when Stonefell’s sword swung whipped around and caught him on the right side of his ribs, knocking out Julius’ breath as he grimaced through the pain.

Side-stepping the man’s next attack, Julius invoked the same spell and sent another jet of fire at Stonefell. The flames licked through his trousers, the muslin burning away, and the older man faltered. Julius rushed in, driving his sword deep into the man’s side, then drew another stripe across his stomach.

“Their deaths were part of a bigger goal,” Stonefell forced out even as he coughed up some blood. “The Briarwoods have their plans, and you will not interfere. Not if I have anything to say about it!”

He rushed at Julius, pinning him to the wall and knocking the sword out of his hand. Julius pushed back against the man’s chest, but Stonefell stood firm. A sting of pain through Julius’ ribs as he was crushed against the wall cut off any words he might have wanted to say, and he needed to focus for a long moment on forcing air into his lungs.

Heavy footfalls could be heard coming up the hall, various shouts echoing off the walls. But despite their volume, Julius could still hear Stonefell’s heavy breathing past his boyish smirk

“Good night, Julius,” Stonefell hissed into his ear, and Julius saw stars as the hilt of a dagger hit his temple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First chapter complete! As you can see, Julius is in a different place than Percy (though I can tell you - some things will be similar ;D) As I said above, this should be updated on Fridays or Saturdays, but please be patient with me if I take a little longer! ^_^
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the first chapter - let me know what you think of it down in the comments!
> 
> (Chapter title from Denethor in Lord of the Rings: Return of the King)


	2. Karma and Current

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julius finds some unexpected company while in prison.
> 
> " _But life inevitably throws us curve balls, unexpected circumstances that remind us to expect the unexpected. I've come to understand these curve balls are the beautiful unfolding of both karma and current_."  
>  -Carre Otis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a little longer than expected to edit/revise, but I knew what I needed to fix, so this is getting up really late on Friday/really early Saturday my time. This chapter is much longer than the first, and includes a familiar face, so I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Lots of thanks, as well, to those people who commented last chapter and everyone who's read this far - I appreciate all of you, even if I'm not great at responding to comments! ^_^

Julius shifted in his cell, trying to get more comfortable on the hard cot provided for him. It had been a little under two weeks since he’d been locked in the cell for “disturbing the peace”, and he was getting anxious. He hadn’t seen Stonefell since getting locked away, and the guards hadn’t answered his questions about the man, or about his own sentence despite repeated requests.

“You just gotta wait,” one of them, Agnes, had said, after only a day of questions. “Either someone’ll come and pay yer bail, or you’ll stay here til yer time’s up. Nothin’ we can do about it. Now keep quiet, and eat yer rations.”

Julius had immediately felt inclined to drop his name and title, but he knew it held no weight after his family’s slaughter. From the little he’d heard mentioned in the village, the story being circulated was that his family had all succumbed to some terrible illness. Then, out of the “goodness of their hearts” and “concern for the citizens” the Briarwoods had taken over the governance of Whitestone instead of returning to Wildmount.

No one knew they had killed the rest of his family and tried to lock him away in order to give themselves a figurehead and keep the people in line.

As it was, he didn’t have the right to be a de Rolo, let alone flaunt the title like it meant nothing to him as he’d heard other nobles do.

After only a couple days Julius had felt feverish and nearly returned his half-digested lunch to the guards’ feet, so a cleric of Pelor had been brought in to treat his injuries from his battle with Kerrion Stonefell. Osahn was older, close to his mother’s age, and though he’d been held with chains while she worked, she hadn’t seemed worried or hesitant about treating him. She had even talked while she tended his wounds, rambling about the cold and the snowstorm outside, and her niece whom she’d just taught how to knit.

It had brought a vaguely nostalgic feeling to his chest that had settled into a sense peace by the evening. That, however, had been echoed by resentment as he fingered the small amulet of Pelor he kept in his pocket. He’d left his past duties, the obligations he had been planning to fulfill, behind him, but there were some things he couldn’t fully let go of, not even after years on his own.

He did, however, appreciate the lack of the sickening heat creeping through his chest and leg.

During the rest of his “stay” a man and a couple woman had been brought in or taken out of the cells, never saying much, probably condemned for minor counts of stealing and such. But they hardly ever stayed for twenty-four hours – a family member always came soon enough, to pay bail and bring them home.

Overall, his stay was getting monotonous after close to a fortnight, and the lack of action had Julius pacing the cell at night, various thoughts and memories haunting his waking hours like the bats that hung in the rafters above him. Stonefell had mentioned the Briarwoods’ “plans” before knocking Julius out, and Julius couldn’t help but wonder if the man had gone to Whitestone to retrieve the couple based off how long he’d been gone.

The thought of seeing them again turned Julius’ stomach and made him pace his cell to relieve the excess energy, but the faint whisper at the back of his head was ready for action. He knew he would fight to the death if they came face-to-face again.

He looked up at the ceiling as a dripping noise made itself known – a leak that let melting snow seep through the roof of the prison. The weather had gotten colder, and the snowstorm Osahn had mentioned had become a blizzard overnight, if the guards’ conversations were to be believed. It would be a plausible reason for Stonefell’s delay, but that didn’t stop him from worrying.

Julius brought to mind the Briarwoods’ faces on a whim, then shuddered at the memory of Sylas’ cold stare, Delilah’s simpering grin, and the gentle touches they shared. Those touches, that warmth between them, parodied the memories he retained of his parents in the worst possible way. He clenched his fists, feeling antsy again, a prickling feeling running over the back of his neck and down both of his arms.

He wished he could summon his sword to go through forms, but he didn’t want to reveal that particular skill to the guards – they already didn’t trust him (because of Kerrion Stonefell’s testimony, he was sure).

Instead, he shook out his limbs and paced from one end of the cell to the other, spinning abruptly on his heel when he neared one wall or the other.

Listening to the rhythmic sound of his feet against the stone, matching it with the beating of his heart, Julius felt the worst of the tension slip away. The repetition and control over some modicum of his life was grounding.

Or, at least, it was, until a ruckus sprung up down the hall, where the guards were stationed.

“Please, if I could explain-“ a young woman’s voice echoed off the stone walls. “It’s really not what you think-“

“I know what we were told,” came Agnes’ voice, carrying the usual monotone with a hint of frustration. “Mister Behrinn told us you were breakin’ into his barn and disturbing the sheep-“

“But one of them was sick – I heard her bleating and I was only trying to-“

“Likely story,” Agnes said, “But you broke into the barn, and regardless of what you were _tryin’_ to do, that’s still private property. You’ll sit til someone comes to pay bail for you, or til you’ve done yer time.”

Agnes finished just as they came into view, and Julius was surprised at the woman accompanying the tall guard.

He placed her around his own age, but she seemed a bit lacking in self-confidence as she looked around the prison with wide, scared eyes. She had on sensible boots and leggings, but her skirt was sheer and her arms were mostly bare, revealing faint markings on them that appeared to be tattoos. Julius didn’t, however, see any form of fur shawl or even a cloak, and he wondered how she had stayed warm in the chilly north of Tal’dorei.

“Please, my friends don’t know where I went, and they don’t know I’m here – If you see Grog, he’s a goliath, or Pike or Scanlan – they’re gnomes, or Vax or Vex who are half-elves, but with black hair – not red like mind – or Tiberius, who’s a dragonborn…” The woman trailed off in her rambling, and dropped her gaze. “Could you- could you maybe let them know I’m here?”

“You said yer name’s Keyleth, right?” Agnes said with a sigh.

Keyleth nodded, and she looked like she was seconds away from bursting into tears.

Agnes nodded, letting go of one of Keyleth’s arms to rub the bridge of her nose.

“If I see any of them with those descriptions, I’ll let them know you’re here,” Agnes promised, patting Keyleth’s shoulder. “But I’m working, so I can’t go lookin’ for them, right? They’ll have to show up first.”

“Oh, thank you!” Keyleth exclaimed, turning toward Agnes, free arm outstretched as if to give her a hug. “Um, I mean, thank you very much,” she amended, dropping her arm and her gaze, her cheeks turning pink.

“It’s no problem,” Agnes said, taking a moment to fumble with a ring of keys until she found the one she was looking for. “Just doing my job.”

Keyleth was escorted into the cell, and Julius couldn’t help smiling at her happier expression, which seemed to practically radiate joy in contrast to her earlier despair. She was certainly different than the townsfolk who’d been locked away over the course of his stay.

“And look – I don’t think you’re too terrible a person, so keep yer head down, and you’ll be outta here soon enough,” Agnes said, nodding as she locked the door again.

“Okay!” Keyleth agreed, waving as the woman turned to head back to the front door. “Thank you, Agnes!”

Agnes chuckled, the first time Julius had heard her do so, and gave a small salute to the woman before continuing back down the hall.

 Julius watched as Keyleth looked around, drying her cheeks with one hand, until her eyes fell on him and she nearly jumped backward in surprise.

“Oh! I-I didn’t realize someone else was here,” she said, eyes wide as they scanned his form. He guessed that she was trying to determine the reason for the rips in his clothing where a sword had torn through them, though his wounds were, for the most part, healed. As a whole she seemed harmless enough, if a bit on the stranger side.

“Not really anywhere else for me to go,” he said, shrugging. He glanced around the cell, at the chamber pot that was emptied twice a day and the plain bed he slept on, a threadbare blanket on top of it that kept out a minimal amount of the winter chill.

Keyleth looked taken aback at his reply, but nodded, scratching her head with her fingers and tangling them in her hair, much like Vesper did… had done, when she was nervous or deep in thought. His oldest younger sister had always had to do something with her hands while thinking, and he remembered her often worrying the fabric of her sleeve or spinning her quill between her fingers during lessons.

“I’m here because a farmer thought I was stealing his sheep,” Keyleth said, as if she were condemning herself to death.

“So I heard.”

The skin on Keyleth’s face flushed pink as she winced. “Right, you were here for that. Sorry, It’s my first time getting arrested. I-“

“It’s quite alright,” Julius interrupted, quite sure she was going to ramble on if he didn’t preempt the rest of her apology. “You were a little preoccupied, and, well, there’s a first time for everything, isn’t there?”

“I suppose,” Keyleth agreed, biting her lip again and twirling her fingers through her hair some more. She took a deep breath, opened her mouth as if to say something, then shut it again. After another indecisive moment, she stuttered out: “I- um- If you don’t mind me asking, that is- Can I know- Could I know- I mean-“

Julius chuckled, and Keyleth winced again.

“Sorry…”

“You want to know why I’m in here?” Julius asked, not able to stop a grin from pulling at the corners of his lips. The young woman continued to remind him of his sister, especially during their speech classes with Professor Anders. The oldest de Rolo daughter had been rather shy at a young age (perhaps not quite as self-conscious as Keyleth), but she’d worked hard at her lessons and found a confident side of her that she exercised with impunity. “I was _formally_ arrested for disturbing the peace.”

“And, informally?”

“I tried to kill a man, and failed.”

Julius really hoped she wouldn’t pry. Keyleth hardly looked the sort to have dealt with death or murder in her past, and Julius didn’t want to taint her view of the world because he’d been stupid. He also didn’t want to talk about his past, but that was beside the point.

When her eyes widened, he worried he’d gone too far, but she simply blinked and tilted her head, face softening.

“Does he deserve it?” she asked.

He blinked, and he felt the center of his chest constrict, an unexpected heat rising beneath his cheeks.

“He does,” Julius forced out, clearing his throat. He wondered who exactly she was, to appear both so naïve and yet so understanding of the pain the world could offer. He was beginning to suspect he had underestimated her at first glance, based on the suddenly guarded look in her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her voice soft.

“There’s nothing you can do about it.”

“I can still be sorry that the world is shitty sometimes,” Keyleth said. She worried her bottom lip between her teeth and hugged herself, seeming to finally notice the chill in the air. A look back over her shoulder revealed only a thin blanket similar to the one in Julius’ cell, and he could see her face fall as she realized the less-than meager comfort it would give her.

He watched as she picked it up, shook it out, folded it in half, and wrapped it around her shoulders like a shawl. She tried to pull it tighter and frowned again.

“Cold?” Julius asked, and Keyleth nodded.

“We- that is, my friends and I, we came up to the Umbra Hills on business, and we packed for the trip, but I left all of my warm clothes in the room because the snow had stopped before I went walking, and it wasn’t _too_ cold, but then I heard the sheep and of course they didn’t let me stop back at the inn before coming here. I grew up in the mountains with my people, so usually I’d be fine, but even in the winter we layer clothes so we don’t get too cold.”

“Your people?” Julius asked, furrowing his brow. He tried to come up with a people who lived in the mountains. The only he could think of that lived in the Alabaster Sierras were Mountain Giants, and while he’d never seen them, he knew Keyleth was not of _that_ particular race.

“The Ashari,” Keyleth clarified, shouldering herself and lifting her chin. “I am Keyleth of the Air Ashari.”

Julius scanned his memory for the Ashari, and remembered them mentioned in one of his history books, though there hadn’t been much information on them.

“Aren’t the Ashari rather reclusive?”

“Oh, you know us?” Keyleth asked, immediately brightening up.

Julius chuckled. “I know of them, yes,” he said, “though I’ve only heard stories. I must say, it is an honor to meet you.”

He bowed at the waist in her direction, only slightly because of the lingering pain in his ribs. She laughed and he grinned.

“You’re almost as bad as Tiberius!” she exclaimed, shaking her head. “I might be on my Aramenté, but it’s not like I’m truly of noble blood or anything.”

“Your… Aramenté?” Julius asked, the word unfamiliar on his tongue.

“Oh, yes!”

Keyleth explained about the journey she was on, about travelling across Tal’dorei and the surrounding continents to visit the other tribes of her people – three beside her own – and told him some of what she might learn from each of them. Julius, who had never had much interaction with magic users beyond the clerics of Erathis and Pelor in Whitestone, his mentor Teilo, or the occasional arcane caster, was fascinated by some of her descriptions.

He asked her some questions, she answered them and asked some of her own, and they built up a rapport of sorts – the physical distance between their cells negated by the easy flow of their words. It was, without a doubt, the most Julius had talked to a single person in years, but he was glad to find it wasn’t as awkward as he thought it might be.

When Keyleth shivered again, Julius offered her his own blanket, citing his warmer clothing and higher tolerance for the winter air as reasons for not needing it. She accepted with only a slight reservation, and Julius had the fun challenge of balling up the fabric and throwing it across the clear center area between them. He’d never been the weak one of the family, but rarely did he need to throw something – especially something so bulky. There was also the added struggle of the bars being in his way, but Julius did manage to land the bundle of cloth only a foot from Keyleth’s cell, where she was able to stretch out an arm between the bars and take hold of it.

“Thanks again,” she said, unfolding her own blanket and matching up their corners before wrapping the new double-layered shawl around her shoulders.

“It was no trouble,” Julius said, smiling. “I’m glad it’s with someone who actually needs it.”

In truth, he was feeling a bit of a chill from the air that was growing steadily cooler as the sun sank outside and the light from the skylight faded, but the company and inane conversation warmed a part of him he hadn’t realized was cold to begin with.


	3. I've Come Too Far

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julius gets swept up into some interesting company. 
> 
> _I've come too far (to see the end now)_  
>  Chapter title from "Nothing Left to Say/Rocks", by Imagine Dragons, which has become my theme song for Julius in the past few weeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Up on Saturday instead of Friday because I've had a really crazy week despite it seeming, at the beginning of the week, like it was going to be normal. Tips for life: Don't sign up for three things in a row, and don't forget to get good sleep. 
> 
> Still, the week is finished, and I did hardcore editing on this chapter (#proudofmyself), and so I hope you guys enjoy it! Let me know what you think in the comments!

It was later that evening, when they’d received their evening meal and each turned away to eat, that Julius’ mind turned back to his predicament. Stonefell had been gone thirteen days by Juilius’ count – just over the time it would take for him to get to Whitestone and back with a horse or carriage – so where was he?

There was also the question of whether he had gone to inform the Briarwoods of Julius’ attempted assassination or not. Julius had assumed so, and while it was true that he hadn’t seen the man in years and didn’t know what Stonefell’s exact connection with the couple was, by the man’s own words he was still privy to some part of their current agenda. And while Julius had no idea what utility Whitstone posed to the Briarwoods other than the export of the city’s namesake rock, Stonefell had mentioned “plans” in the present tense, which was concerning.

Julius didn’t want to think about what the Briarwoods could still be doing to Whitestone, to his home, to the people…

He pulled up a mental image of the town square, where the Sun Tree rose over the smooth cobblestones, and imagined a steady rainstorm falling over the town, the sky black and the people conspicuously absent. In his mind’s eye, the castle on the hill that overlooked the ground had fallen, only moss-covered grey stones in its place.

Shuddering at the thought, Julius turned his mind back to the present, back to Stonefell. A real, concrete question that would hopefully be answered soon enough.

On one hand, the man might have decided it was easier to leave Julius to rot in a cell in Jorenn Village than deal with the hassle of getting the Briarwoods involved. On the other hand, he might have had business to attend to in the town (or even in other cities) before returning to Whitestone, in which case it could take anywhere from a couple weeks to over a month for Julius to know what was in store for him.

And even then, Julius reminded himself, Stonefell could take even longer to return, wanting to keep Julius on edge. Stonefell had never been the smartest, but he knew how to get under someone’s skin, and Julius was already feeling the need to spar, to run, to do _something_ , pulling at him. Julius might never have been as anxious as Percy, nor as concerned about what others thought as Cassandra, but preparation for leadership of Whitestone had alerted him to the fickleness of people’s minds and attitudes.

He’d never needed to worry about what others would do when he was younger and the stakes were no higher than “I’m going to tell Mother”. Now, however, with such a sensitive matter, so close to home, he couldn’t help the anxiety that rose up at the thought of his future.

His whole family had been helpless, slaughtered by the Briarwoods and their associates. Even if his family name carried little weight now, he wanted to avenge the deaths of those who had been killed with no chance to fight back.

A dark, budding anger pulsed in Julius’ chest, and he felt a short spike of nausea as it made itself known, remembering the vision of black smoke that had come to him nearly two years prior, whispering that it would make it possible for Julius to get the retribution he desired.

Julius put little stock in the gods and even less in formless entities that appeared in his dreams – he had made it this far in his life through his own work, and he’d make it farther still, assuming he wasn’t locked in a dank cell for the rest of his days. But that didn’t mean that a small part of him wasn’t worried about the shadow’s meaning or intent.

He wasn’t stupid – he knew that there were entities stronger than himself out there. Devils and demons roamed different planes of existence, and the gods held their own sort of sway, even if they never took a vested interest in what happened on the material plane. There were even mortals who had ascended to god-like power through their own or others’ means.

Julius knew that something strange had occurred two years before, be it a dream, apparition, or hallucination. But until it came back as more than a memory, a whisper of vengeance recalled at moments of stress or fear, Julius decided not to give it thought.

As Julius set aside his empty plate and drained the rest of the water he’d been given, he realized Keyleth had gone very quiet. He’d grown used to her seemingly endless comments over the course of the day and for her to not speak through their whole meal was concerning.

Looking up, he saw she had barely touched the food on her plate – a bite was taken out of the biscuit, and a bit of the cheese had been broken off, but the roasted chicken leg was still there, undisturbed. Lifting his eyes to her face he noted that she was staring off into the flame of one of the torches, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.

Just as he was considering whether to ask her about it or not – having younger siblings and a lover had given him rudimentary skills to deal with emotions – Keyleth murmured something that didn’t carry quite all the way across the damp prison.

“What was that?” Julius asked, rising from where he’d been sitting on his cot and approaching her.

Keyleth was quiet for a long moment, long enough for Julius to wonder if she’d heard him, but then she spoke up.

“I said, ‘I wonder if they’re even going to come’,” Keyleth murmured, wiping her eyes with the back of either hand.

She pulled her legs into her chest and held them tight. “I mean, I’m only one of seven, and Scanlan and Tiberius can do plenty of magic, and Pike is better at healing than I am. I just- they don’t need my help, so why would they come looking? We were going to head out early this afternoon after staying the night, but now it’s evening and Agnes hasn’t said anything about seeing them yet-“

“Hey, it’s alright,” Julius interrupted as her voice sped up, bordering on hysterical. “Jorenn Village might be small, but there’s plenty of places they could be looking. You said you’ve never been to jail before?”

She looked up at the question, blinking hard.

“No.”

“Well, there you have it. This might be the last place they look,” Julius pointed out. The two of them had talked more about themselves than the group Keyleth was travelling with, but he doubted they’d leave her behind, based on how fondly she spoke of them all. If they did, then they were assholes, and Julius would be more than happy to teach them each a lesson. “Give them until tomorrow, then you can worry.”

Keyleth chuckled, and Julius counted that as a win.

“Ye of little faith,” said an unfamiliar amused voice, coming out of nowhere. Julius jumped, turning toward the entrance to the cell block, and saw a hooded figure step out of the shadows.

“Vax!” Keyleth exclaimed.

“The one and only,” Vax said, throwing back the jet-black hood of his cloak with a smirk.

Revealed was a half-elven man, roughly Keyleth’s age, with long black hair falling over his shoulders, a small portion of it pulled away from his face and secured at the back of the head.

“What happened to Agnes and the other guards?” Keyleth asked as Vax swept over to her cell, hardly making a sound on the stone floor.

“Knocked out, for now,” Vax said, fiddling with the lock for only a moment before it sprung open. Julius was both impressed at the talent and mildly disappointed. Keyleth had been a strong point of light in his life – the first in a while.

A small, selfish part of him wished she could stay locked away, if only to make his final days a bit better, but he immediately tamped that down. He focused, instead, on Keyleth’s overjoyed smile as she dropped the blankets and ran out the door of her cell, throwing her arms around Vax.

Julius winced at the enthusiasm of her greeting, but Vax, to his credit, only stiffened slightly as he braced himself, then awkwardly patted Keyleth on the shoulder.

“C’mon,” he said, gently pulling her arms off his shoulders. “The others are waiting outside. If we want to be gone before the alarm sounds, we need to move.”

“But-“

Keyleth turned to look back at Julius, and he tried not to put too much hope in the glance she shot him. Vax seemed to be in a hurry, his eyes already fixed on their exit, his attention tuned to pick out any sound of the guards should they begin to stir.

“What is it, Keyleth?” he asked, distracted. “Yes, we got all your things, no we don’t need to stop at the inn. We’ll probably travel for a few hours tonight, then pick up as early as we can tomorrow morning.”

“I was wondering…” Keyleth trailed off, pulling back from Vax and moving toward Julius’ cell. She took a deep breath and continued. “I was wondering if we could bring Julius with us.”

“Who’s Julius?” Vax asked, glancing back over his shoulder. “Wait, him?”

Julius wasn’t sure whether or not he should feel offended by the scathing tone of voice, but tried not to show it. He was, of course, in a prison cell, he hadn’t bathed in several weeks, and he had the beginnings of a scruffy beard growing in.

“He was nice to me!”

“Everybody’s nice to you, Keyleth,” Vax said with a sigh.

“But he doesn’t deserve to be here!”

Vax gave her an ‘Oh really’ look at that – one that Julius knew well from years of being the oldest brother with six younger siblings. Julius didn’t blame him in the slightest, either. If Oliver or Ludwig had come to him and asked for a prisoner from the dungeons to be released because they’d “made a friend”, he wouldn’t have entertained the idea for a moment.

There was also the fact that Julius knew, by law, that he certainly _did_ deserve to be locked away. While he had a reason for what he did, that didn’t mean attempting to kill a man wasn’t meriting of some punishment.

“Keyleth,” he began, at the same time as Vax, who shot Julius a look that had him shutting his mouth.

“Keyleth,” Vax repeated, in a tone of voice that was trying (and failing) to not sound condescending, “He’s been locked up by the authorities. Do you even know what for?”

“Disturbing the peace,” Keyleth said without hesitation, just as Julius opened his mouth to say “Attempted Murder”.

He closed his mouth once again.

Vax rolled his eyes. “And what did he do to disturb the peace? Did you talk about _that_?”

“He tried to kill a man and failed,” she said, also without hesitation.

Julius saw the moment that Vax realized just what she’d said, and Julius wanted to drop his face into his hands at her unabashed statement. She meant well, but…

“Keyleth-“

“The man had hurt his family, Vax,” Keyleth argued. “ _We_ just killed a cult leader and his steed so we could help our friend!”

“That’s different-“

“And we actually succeeded!” Keyleth continued, her voice rising to a slightly higher pitch. “Whereas Julius failed.”

“Thanks, Keyleth,” Julius muttered, though he felt like he couldn’t exactly be angry with her for trying to get him rescued.

Vax’s lips pressed into a narrow frown, and he looked over to Julius, who was still standing just behind the bars to his cell. Julius did his best to look unassuming, but stood tall under the half-elf’s hard stare, waiting for judgement.

“I suppose we can let him out,” Vax conceded, removing his lock picks from inside his cloak. “But I can’t promise he’ll be coming with us.”

“But Vax-“

“We’re only two out of seven, Keyleth. That’s not our decision.”

“Okay,” Keyleth replied sullenly, rolling her eyes.

Julius couldn’t figure out just what had changed in Vax’s opinion of him, but he wasn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Vax unlocked Julius’ cell with the same speed and finesse he had Keyleth’s, and Julius pushed open the door, remembering the last time he’d been released from imprisonment. He was grateful that Vax’s facial features and grave manner distinguished him from Cassandra, though the two of them wielded lock picks with the same intensity.

“Thank you,” he said, nodding to Vax as he approached him. “But will the guards be waking soon?”

“They should be,” Vax confirmed, still keeping a careful eye on Julius, even as he turned. “Come on, Keyleth, let’s go.”

The two of them started down the hall, and Julius kept close behind them. His fingers twitched, wanting his sword, but he didn’t want to startle them by calling Aetherius to his hand without good reason.

They came to the front room, where the guards had obviously been knocked out at their posts, and Julius turned, going for the room he reasoned had his personal effects stored inside.

“What are you doing?” Vax hissed at him with a sharp glare. “We need to go!”

“I’m only grabbing my things.”

Julius ducked into the room and glanced around, noticing a box helpfully labelled “Prisoners’ Possessions”. Inside he found his bag and coin pouch (which, miraculously, seemed to be undisturbed), and beneath them, Aetherius, his scimitar, safely nestled in his sheath. He strapped them to his person, then looked around and spied his thick coat and travelling cloak hanging from the same hook on the wall. He slid them on and headed out.

“About time,” Vax muttered as Julius exited the room. Julius refrained from rolling his eyes and headed to the prison’s door, where Keyleth was standing, looking anxious.

\--

Based on Keyleth’s many and varied stories, Julius had known that the rest of Keyleth’s companions were a motley bunch, but that didn’t prepare him for the sight that entertained him on the edge of town, just off the main road.

He’d seen gnomes while travelling with his father for various diplomatic events, but never had he seen a goliath, nor a dragonborn, both of whom had to have at least a head on him. Compared to the gnomes- hells, compared to _himself_ they were practically giants, and yet one of the gnomes – armored, with dark hair – was playing noughts and crosses with the goliath in a small patch of dirt.

The other gnome, who wore an obscenely bright purple tunic, was twiddling his fingers over a shawm as if practicing notes for a song, and he looked up as they approached.

“About time!” he said, hopping up from the ground. “But who’s this?”

The other four looked up, eyes drawn to Julius as if he had a target painted on him. He noted a female half-elf, who could only be Vax’s sister, already had her right hand on the arrows in her quiver, her bow subtly readied in her left. She glanced to her brother, who tilted his head slightly and gave her a look that was difficult for Julius to identify. She frowned at him, but relaxed slightly, and Julius swallowed hard, remembering Oliver and Whitney doing the same thing far too often.

“Ah, Princess!” exclaimed the dragonborn in a loud, accented voice. Julius looked at him, confused, but the red draconic figure was looking past him, toward Keyleth. “I have been holding onto your staff as we awaited your safe return, and I am happy to see you safely free at last! Ah, here- here you go.”

The dragonborn hurried over to them, nearly tripping over the long hem of his robes as he held out a long staff of gnarled wood as if it were an offering to the half-elf.

“Um, thanks, Tiberius,” Keyleth said, a genuine smile on her face. “But I have told you not to call me Princess.”

“Of course, Keyleth,” Tiberius said, bowing his head to her. “Though-“

“Sorry to interrupt, Tiberius,” Vax interjected, “but we _really_ should be heading out, since the guards should be waking up soon and-“

He was cut off by the ringing of the town bell, the loud tolls echoing through the village streets.

“And doing that,” he finished hurriedly. “Anyway. Julius, this is everyone; everyone, this is Julius. He’ll be running with us for a little while, so let’s go.”

Vax ran between the rest of them and straight into the forest, quickly followed by his sister. The goliath scooped up the two gnomes and took off after them, his speed making up for his lack of stealth.

“Poppycock,” Tiberius grumbled, seeming flustered, but he simplycast a spell that allowed him to soar up over the trees and away. Keyleth pulled Julius forward by the hand as they sprinted into the trees, disappearing into the dense forest just as the last peals of the bells died away.


	4. Not Quite Sold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julius meets the rest of the gang, and gets acquainted with some of the... stranger aspects of the SHITs.
> 
>  _"Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep/Dreaming about the things that we could be/.../Old, but I'm not that old/Young, but I'm not that bold/And I don't think the world is sold/On just doing what we're told..."_  
>  -"Counting Stars", OneRepublic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this took me a very long time for two reasons:  
> 1) It kind of wouldn't end? It just kept going, and I just kept wanting to add things, and then it needed to close up somehow, so here we are with almost 4k words in one chapter xD  
> 2) I've got two weeks left of school (including finals) and I'm seriously so exhausted. Physics sucks, and while my other classes are good, I'm also applying to graduate school this summer and working on getting a job and still practicing for performances coming up ^_^.  
> That being said, thank you all for sticking with me and coming back for another chapter! 
> 
> But, re: school, there probably won't be a chapter next week b/c of school stresses and everything. I know where the story is going, but I need some time to get the words on paper and free time is not something I have over the next two weeks :/ I might write some smaller things on my tumblr, and I'll post there when I'm planning on updating again, when I start figuring out my life! ;) 
> 
> Less than three, and I hope you enjoy this chapter - I liked exploring Julius' thoughts about everyone, and we'll get to see more of that in the coming chapters ;)

After several long hours of making their way through the forest south of Jorenn Village, Vax’s sister found them a clearing they could use to make camp. It was pitch black, and cloudy enough overhead that only a couple stars shone down on them – not nearly enough to provide light to see by – but Tiberius conjured several orbs of light that hung in midair, illuminating the surrounding area.  

The rest of the group seemed to have a system, and Julius watched from the edge of the clearing as the goliath dug them a fire pit and the dragonborn cleared away small rocks and twigs with a repeated flick of his wrist. The rest of them were unpacking their bags, laying out their bedrolls in a comfortable enough silence that it was clear they had followed the routine many times before.

Julius hung back, not wanting to place his things where they wouldn’t be appreciated by the others. He noted that the twins laid their knapsacks next to each other, and that the gnomes seemed to be sticking together as well, and wondered how he fit in their strange little group.

Looking around the rest of the clearing, by the light of one of the orbs, Julius saw something in the woods to his right. A large form moved through the trees, not conspicuous, but not hidden either.

Julius approached the tree line slowly, trying to see what was watching them. It didn’t seem malevolent, but one couldn’t be too careful, especially when they were still close to the Umbra Hills.  

He froze in place when he realized it was the form of a bear snuffling around the ground, seemingly unperturbed by so many humans close by. While Julius wasn’t sure why the bear hadn’t taken notice of them, he didn’t want to take the risk of it charging.

Cautiously edging closer, Julius noted that it wasn’t too large a bear, certainly not as large as some that roamed the Alabaster Sierras – perhaps if he ran at it, sword out, he might scare it away. Perhaps their goliath companion would be a better choice – certainly larger and hardier – but glancing over his shoulder, he saw that the goliath was starting their fire, strangely intent on striking the rock on flint.

Making a, probably stupid, decision, Julius started to draw his sword. Unfortunately, the bear seemed to hear, his head rising up, his large eyes gleaming as they caught the reflection of Tiberius’ magical lights.

Julius froze, his sword halfway out of its sheath, staring down a predator that he was suddenly _very_ sure wouldn’t be scared away by him and his sword.

His idea had indeed, in retrospect, been quite stupid.

“Trinket, did you find something?” came a female voice from behind Julius, who nearly jumped out of his skin at the surprise.

Vax’s sister strode past Julius, and he felt a rising horror in his chest as the slight woman approached the bear, oblivious to the potential danger.

“I really don’t think you should-“ Julius managed to get out, his voice sounding like Percival’s before his growth spurt, before the bear burst through the tree line toward them and he backed away, drawing his sword the rest of the way and holding it before him.

He then watched in fascination as the bear, which held a brace of foxes in its jaws, dropped the animals at the half-elf’s feet and butted its head against her chest, not unlike an oversized dog.  

“Oh, good boy!” she exclaimed, rubbing his head and scratching behind his ears.

Julius still stood there, his sword arm falling to the side, limp, as he watched their interaction. He had obviously _vastly_ misjudged the situation.

Feeling dazed, Julius continued to watch as the half-elf planted kisses on the furry face of the creature, who had actually slumped to the ground, tongue out and eyes closed in what couldn’t be anything but pure bliss.

“I don’t get it either.”

Julius started for the second time in as many minutes, spinning to see the purple-clad gnome standing beside him, twirling a stray lock of hair around his finger. “I mean, it’s a bear, and she treats it like a kitten.”

“This is… normal?”

“Yep. That’s Vex, and that’s her _bear_ , Trinket,” the gnome said with a roll of his eyes. It was apparent that the creature was not the gnome’s favorite member of their group.

“But isn’t her brother-“

“Vax’ildan and Vex’ahlia,” the gnome said, gesturing to each as he said their name, “Vax and Vex for short, practically identical twins. It’s not confusing at all, of course.”

“I… can imagine.”

“Just say one or the other – the right one will probably answer, and even if it’s the wrong one at least you tried,” the gnome said, shrugging.

Julius simply stared at him for a moment, confused, then realized that his sword was still hanging at his side.

He sheathed it as quietly as he could, glancing around to see if anyone had noticed, but everyone was still busy with their own tasks. Vex’ahlia, Vex, had picked up the limp bodies of the foxes and was bringing them over to the fire. The other gnome, Keyleth, and Vax came out of the woods on the other side of the clearing, mostly with more fuel and kindling for the fire, but also with various mushrooms and plants that would apparently be added to some sort of stew that Tiberius was already stirring, babbling to the others as he did so.

“I’m Scanlan, by the way,” the gnome beside him said, also watching the others. “Scanlan Shorthalt, Bard Extraordinaire, previous member of Dr. Dranzel’s infamous travelling troupe, and current leader of the SHITs.”

“That’s nice,” Julius said blithely, before realizing what Scanlan had said. “Hold on, leader- leader of the _shits_?”

“That’s us,” Vax confirmed from right behind Julius, making him jump for the third time that night. (He obviously needed to brush up on his awareness. This was getting ridiculous.) “The Super High Intensity Team. Don’t ask me why that’s the name we settled on, but that’s us.”

He gestured to the rest of their campsite, to the goliath, the other gnome, Vex, Keyleth, and Tiberius. A ragtag group of mercenaries named “the SHITs”.

Julius couldn’t help but think of how he would have reacted to them two years prior. Entitled Julius Gatremaine von Musel Klossowski de Rolo the First, heir to Whitestone, eldest of his family, would have scoffed at these vagabonds, wondering why they didn’t just find some place to settle down and make something of themselves. Now, Julius knew only too well the life of a peasant instead of a lord, and while mercenaries still weren’t his favored company, he better understood their place in the world. And they had rescued him from whatever awaited him at Stonefell’s (or the Briarwoods’) hands. That counted for something.

“It’s a good name!” Scanlan protested, crossing his arms over his chest. “And we came up with it together.”

“You and Pike and Keyleth came up with it while drunk and it stuck.”

“Same difference.”

“Oh, go help Tiberius with the cooking,” Vax scoffed. “He could always use an inspiring song to make a better stew.”

“But I’m getting to know our new companion, Julius,” Scanlan said, sweeping an arm toward Julius. “We’re becoming the best of friends!”

“I got the impression I was getting to know you, not the other way around,” Julius said wryly, pursing his lips.

“It’s a give-and-take deal here,” Scanlan said pointedly, shaking his head like Julius was an amusing child. “First I give, and then I receive.”

“Mmm,” Julius hummed, warily eyeing the man, not sure what he was planning on asking. Julius looked up to where Vax had been standing, hoping for some support, but the man had already disappeared into the shadows of the night without a trace.

“So, how are you liking this “life on the road” thing so far?” Scanlan asked.

“I’ve travelled on my own before now – it’s not too bad,” Julius said, grateful for the innocuous question.

“Ah, a young man who can hold his own, then. But even against a pet bear?”

Julius felt his cheeks flush slightly, but he was proud of his cool response. “I’m hardly a novice to hard living. I could have handled him.”

It was a half-truth – while he’d certainly spent his share of days sleeping under the stars and keeping himself safe from beasts, he’d spent most of his life in Whitestone. He’d then stayed for a couple years in a town near the outskirts of Kymal, practicing his skills with sword and magic, hoping to one day return to Whitestone and bring justice to the Briarwoods for their crimes.

“Ah yes, one ferocious bear is no problem for the likes of you,” Scanlan said sagely, nodding with an air of all seriousness. “But have you ever run for your life through the woods? Dodged away from the authorities and only getting away by the skin of your teeth?”

Julius felt his chest tighten and sucked in a deep breath. “You’d be surprised.”

“Really?” Scanlan asked, nodding almost as if he were proud. “Color me impressed. But what would a pretty boy like you be running from, with those rugged good looks?”

Julius lifted his hand to the beard that had grown around his mouth in the past fortnight, trying to let on to the frantic beating of his heart beneath his chest. He wasn’t sure if Scanlan was being rhetorical or if he desired an answer, but Julius felt his breath grow short as memories flooded him.

He heard the crunch of fresh snow beneath his boots, remembered Oliver teasing him, harmlessly, about being the “pretty boy” of the family (with the indignance and scorn that could only come from a younger brother).

He saw crimson splotches on the ground, heard the baying of wolfhounds from behind him.

He remembered a low snarl in his ear, his wrists held behind his back – Sylas Briarwood asking his wife if they could “keep the pretty one”.

Cassandra’s arm was linked with his own as she tried to match his longer strides. She stumbled, fell-

He heard Whitney’s voice in his head. Was it boys or girls who were meant to be pretty? Why couldn’t both be “pretty”? Julius hadn’t been able to answer.

Then he saw the river behind the castle, rushing thick and fast with melting snow, rising up to meet him as his heart shot up into his throat and dark smoke swirled through his lungs-

“Julius?”

Julius sucked in a deep breath, coming back to the present. He flinched as something touched his arm, and pulled away, trying to regulate his breathing.

There was a tense silence between them as Julius tried to stay silent and still, forcing away the prickling at the backs of his eyelids with frustration. He’d studied with Teilo for a year or so, been on his own for at least two, and here he was, close to breaking down in front of someone he’d known for less than a day.

He needed sleep, and for people to stop asking him questions.

The two of them stood for a moment, the chatter from the rest of the group carrying across the clearing, laughter punctuating their words.

He turned back to Scanlan, who looked mildly concerned.

“As I said,” Julius murmured, doing his best to let his shoulders relax while keeping his face impassive. “You’d be surprised.”

Scanlan’s expression changed quickly, nearly giving Julius whiplash as the raised eyebrow and slight frown morphed into a jovial smile.

“A man with secrets – excellent!” he proclaimed.

Julius stared at him for a moment, nonplussed. “Because you wish to discover them, or because it gives you a reason not to trust me?”

“On the contrary, my good Julius – none of our group is without a secret, as it is with most of the world. But a man with secrets is a man with layers. It means there’s more to you than meets the eye.”

Scanlan winked and tapped his temple with a finger. “You might discover some of them if you stick around a while.”

A whistle from near the fire caught his attention, then, and he perked up.

“But not right now!” Scanlan said, waving toward the goliath, who was holding up a bowl and grinning. “It’s time for food!”

And Scanlan disappeared in a shimmer of purple light, reappearing on the goliath’s shoulders and snatching the bowl away. The larger man roared briefly in jest, but Scanlan just danced around his shoulders, not spilling a drop of the stew, as he whistled a happy tune. The others laughed and Keyleth, a small smile pulling at her lips, filled another, much bigger, bowl for the goliath’s dinner.

“He likes showing off, he does.”

Julius was proud not to jump when the half-elf’s voice came from behind him again. Instead he turned slowly, locking eyes with the man, but Vax only smiled, flipping one of his daggers between his fingers.

Julius rolled his eyes. It was exactly something Oliver or Whitney would have done – sneaking up from behind while their quarry was otherwise occupied. Once upon a time he’d been used to checking his surroundings for eavesdropping younger siblings, but now…

He wondered how much Vax had heard – if he would ask about what Scanlan hadn’t – but Vax simply twirled the dagger around his finger one last time and slid it back into a place on his belt.

“You know, Grog can eat like a horse if he wants to. You should probably get some food while there’s still some left.”

Julius raised an eyebrow. “Grog?”

“The goliath.”

“Named after an alcoholic beverage?”

“Ale is one of his passions,” Vax said with a smirk and a shrug.

Julius glanced over to where the goliath sat, scooping up stew with his fingers and talking through large bites.

“Mmmhmm,” he hummed.

His stomach grumbled slightly, wanting sustenance after hours of tramping through a forest, but Julius still felt wary about approaching the circle. The rest of them were talking together, eating together, and though it was not in a large hall with a good table and silverware, it evoked a strange sense of nostalgia that Julius hadn’t expected.

“No one’s gonna question you tonight – we’re all dead tired,” Vax said knowingly, actually grabbing Julius’ arm and leading him toward the rest of the SHITs. “Get some food and get to bed – you look half-starved and dead tired.”

Julius stumbled forward as the shorter man pulled him along, then tugged his arm away from Vax under the pretense of smoothing his shirt, pretending as though the grip on his arm hadn’t brought back that heightened sense of worry and anxiety. Vax didn’t seem to notice, but it could have been because the half elf had already forged ahead and gotten a bowl of stew from his sister, sitting on the ground with her to eat it.

“Here you go, Julius!” Keyleth said as he came over, holding a bowl out to him, a smile on her face. “It’s not a lot, but we’ve got some bread to go with it, and the fox meat is quite good, a little tough, but…”

She then showed him just how good it was by using her fork to take out a piece and stick it in her mouth, humming as she did so.  

Julius couldn’t help but grin at the sight of her nodding profusely as she chewed, still smiling around the bite.

Keyleth gestured to his bowl and raised an eyebrow as she swallowed, so Julius took his fork and speared one of the small pieces of the meat, bringing it to his own mouth.

It was certainly more than “a little” tough, but luckily Tiberius, or Grog – whoever had been cooking – hadn’t overcooked the meat, and it was perfectly edible. The mix of flavors was not one he was entirely familiar with, especially as his general fare since setting out on his own was rather bland, but it was certainly better than anything he’d had in a while; the rich, earthy scent of the mushrooms and the thickness of the potatoes added in brought a nice fullness to the dish.

He finished the bite and swallowed, giving a nod to Keyleth and turning to the others, who he realized had fallen silent, watching him.

“It’s very good, thank you,” he said, straightening up as he felt the accent of his childhood push through more than he had intended it to.

“You are most welcome,” Tiberius said, smiling and raising his own bowl in a sort-of toast. “And please, if you want more, simply ask.”

Julius nodded his thanks and, sitting beside Keyleth, continued eating as conversation slowly resumed.  

The sound of metal sliding against metal came from his left and Julius turned to see the armored gnome approaching him, holding out the end of a loaf. So close for the first time, he noted that while he had thought her hair to be a solid dark brown or black color, it was actually interspersed with purple streaks. To have achieved such a bright color was an interesting feat, especially with the, apparently, darker color of her natural hair, and Julius had a strange, curious desire to ask her how she had done it.

“Here’s some bread,” she said, her voice lighter and gentler than he had expected, her smile wide. Julius thanked her, nodding as he took it, and kept his mouth shut. It wasn’t polite to pry, especially when they had only just met.

“I’m Pike, by the way,” she added, stretching out her hand again. “Pike Trickfoot.”

“Julius.”

He shook her hand, and noted the pendant she wore around her neck – a familiar enough sight back home, especially at the temple.

“Are you religious?” he asked, trying to keep his voice neutral. It wasn’t that he disdained those who worshipped the gods – if they took comfort in the supposed providence of deities, then good for them. But there was little doubt in Julius’ mind that while the gods might have smiled on the de Rolos and Whitestone at one point, they were no longer involved.

“Oh, yes!” Pike exclaimed, pulling the pendant fully out from behind her armor. “I’m a cleric of Sarenrae.”

With what was unmistakably a holy symbol now revealed, Julius noted the iconic wings stretching up from the back of the small figure, and the halo around the effigy of the goddess. Sarenrae had never held a presence or temple in Whitestone, but all the de Rolo children had studied the various deities of the land, and the Everlight had been included in those lessons.

“Well met,” Julius acknowledged. While a cleric seemed an odd choice of occupation for someone who was, at the very least, a part-time mercenary, he wondered if Pike was preaching Sarenrae’s light across Exandria, using “the SHITs” as a mechanism for her ministry. “Sarenrae is the goddess of redemption, yes?”

“Of healing and second chances, yeah,” Pike said, rubbing the holy symbol between her fingers. “She’s not very well known, but her following is growing. She gave me a second chance, and now I use most of what I’ve from her to keep these idiots from dying all the time.”

There was some varied protests from around the fire, including several “Come on, now”s and an “Oh, that’s not fair” from Keyleth, but everyone was grinning.

“You’re the best of us, Pike my darling,” Scanlan threw out with a wink and a blown kiss. “How could we ever match your splendor?”

“You couldn’t,” Pike said, rolling her eyes with a grin. “But if you all didn’t get injured so often, it would make my job ten times easier, and less stressful.”

“You’re so powerful though, Pike,” interjected Grog, the goliath. “That’s what makes you special – you can fight, but you can also do the magic thing and heal us up. I mean, Scanlan and Keyleth can heal us a bit, but I wouldn’t give you up for anything.”

“Thank you, Grog,” Pike said, a shy smile pulling at her lips as her cheeks flushed pink. “But it’s nothing, really.”

There was a slew of protests once again, and the conversation continued in that vein for a while as Julius returned to his stew and bread, content to simply watch the rest of them interact. The nostalgia was growing strong once again, though it was tainted with a deep-set pain that he couldn’t quite shake.

Soon enough, the group had fallen silent and a wordless, unanimous decision was made among them to turn in for the night as they handed their bowls over to Tiberius to be cleaned with magic.

Vax and Vex readied themselves for the first watch, taking up positions by the fire, and Julius was about to offer to take the second – it was the least he could do when they had saved him – but before he could, Pike had come up to his side, standing tall despite her shorter stature.

“We’ve got watches covered for tonight,” she said, patting his uninjured side. “I noticed you favoring your leg, though – is there anything I can do to help?”

Julius frowned and shifted his weight back and forth, testing the pressure put on the limb. There was a slight twinge of pain, but nothing serious – certainly nothing in need of magical healing.

“I’m fine for the time being,” he said, the corner of his lip quirking as he watched one of her eyebrows rise high on her forehead, obviously dubious of his assurance.

“Honestly,” Julius said with a chuckle, bending his knee and straightening it again. “I do believe it’s alright. It’s sore, but most of me is after our jaunt through the woods. I think tomorrow I’ll be feeling much better.”

Pike examined his face for a long moment. “If you say so,” she said, though she still wore that disbelieving expression that told him she’d be keeping an eye on him.  

“If it’s anything more than a mild ache tomorrow I’ll let you take a look at it,” Julius said, which seemed to mollify the smaller woman.

She wished him a good night’s sleep and wandered back over to Grog, leaving Julius to lay out his bedroll. Tiberius extinguished the magical lights, revealing the presence of faint stars in the sky, and the rest of them fell silent after a few moments. Julius laid down in the place he had claimed on the edge of their bivouac and stared up at the stars for a long while, trying to find the pictures made from them that he’d learned oh so long ago. It was hard, especially as he had never been one for the study of the heavens, not like Ludwig, or even Cassandra, who had asked their mother when she would be able to stay up late and actually see all the constellations she’d only ever read about in books.  

Julius remembered Johanna saying that she had to wait until she was thirteen.

The Briarwoods had come two months before her birthday.

Julius shuddered and turned on his bedroll to watch the flickering fire and the twins, who were having a hushed conversation. He had a strange urge to stay up, to keep an eye on the, frankly, questionable company he’d found for himself, but after only a couple minutes he felt his eyelids drooping and his breathing slowing.

Shifting his arm so a bump on the ground wasn’t digging into him, Julius readjusted his bag which was doubling as pillow. And, after only a minute or two more, he drifted off to the sound of wind in the trees, the distant hooting of an owl, and the faint crackling of the fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashley said on Talks Machina that Pike's hair was black with purple streaks in it before she died and it turned a white/blonde and I kinda can't get enough of it... So yeah, if you haven't heard that, it's canon. 
> 
> Also, Teilo (TYE-lo, like Kylo xP) was mentioned this chapter, and I'm working on developing his character still. He was Julius' mentor during his time around Kymal, and one of several OCs I'll be introducing for story purposes. Look forward to more information about him in future chapters! (Though, maybe not for a while...)
> 
> Thank you all once again for reading, and let me know what you thought down below in the comments, or over on tumblr!

**Author's Note:**

> For updates and musings about this and some of my other works, check out my writing tumblr: [dancerwrites](http://dancerwrites.tumblr.com).


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